Monday, April 6, 2009

Don't Judge Me, I Won't Judge You

Apparently April is Cesarean Awareness Month. The people at the International Cesarean Awareness Network have created this catchy little icon to commemorate the month. I cannot tell you how much this angers me. According to their site "the burgundy color of the ribbons represents birth and the wearing of the ribbon upside down symbolizes the state of distress many pregnant women find themselves in when their birthing choices are limited. The loop of the inverted ribbon represents a pregnant belly and the tails are the arms of a woman outstretched in a cry for help." They note that "psychological outcomes such as negative feelings, fear, guilt, anger and postpartum depression are common consequences of both emergent and elective cesarean sections". OMG - the only reason some people feel these negative feelings are because of other people like those who support groups like ICAN putting those ideas out there. That you are not a "real woman" if you didn't have a natural childbirth.

Give me a break, people. Having a cesarean birth does not make you a victim. I do not feel like I missed out on anything. I have 3 healthy children. I had an emergency c-section with the first, and elected them with the other two. I did not make that choice lightly - I was not coerced or scared by doctors to making that choice. I read all the studies, reviewed my options and made my choice for myself. And for the ICAN to decided that "my choices were limited" disparages my choice.

Every woman should have the opportunity to make birthing choices for themselves (given medical realities of their specific situation). Don't belittle mine and I won't belittle yours.


Mordermi said...

Tis worth noting that you *did* do about 7 hrs of labor on the first, including the joyous time spent waiting for the epidural to be given after going without drugs for a few hours.

You had enough pain to crunch a few of my hand bones, no worries that you "missed out".

And #3 came a day early you didn't miss the "surprise! you're in labor!" experience either.

Maybe you missed the "I was in labor for 29 hours before you finally came out" experience...but somehow, I don't count that a big loss and neither do you. You didn't need an extra 3 days to recover from your traumatic ordeal, like the folks we've seen who spent over a day in labor.

jill said...

I was one of those water broke at 8pm, artifically induced with pitocin but determined to go without drugs people, until I'd been in labor a whole day (and awake for 2) and couldnt have a contraction without crying, THEN they decided they had me up too high (you think, you snarky nuse, I've been having those '3rd stage contractions' that are only supposed to last for 2 hours right before you push, for 5 hours now, coming a minute apart and lasting a minute and I'm not even halfway dilated)--yeah I was pissed off -they had given me drugs to calm me down and they told my husband if I hadn't done that, that I would have passed out and they'd have been forced to do a c section. As it was, she wouldnt have come out anyway - rotten pelvis on my part... and i would have ended up with a c section, and yes it did about torture me UNTIL the breastfeeding wouldnt work. then that tortured me, its just one thing after another, although now that the hormones have calmed down a little bit, its a little yes i was mad but i'm not sure i need a ribbon about it.